Have you ever noticed that the best moments in your life were when uncertainty was prevalent in your life? When you are unclear on the road ahead, life changing things start to happen and your life took on new meaning. I know that when I have stepped out into uncertainty I’ve grown in so many ways that I now relish that uncertainty more and more.
So what do I mean by uncertainty?
It’s the not knowing, a feeling of absolute blindness and can leave you pretty uptight and anxious.
Your life is hanging there in the wings but you move forward anyway doing what you have to do to stay focussed and alive. Yeah it’s scary and very uncomfortable. It will make you re-think your life, re-assess where you are and will totally show you who is there alongside you too.
Uncertainty will push your buttons and make you face truths about yourself, your life and those around you that you probably won’t want to face. It will force you to face it however, and that my friend is the wonderful truth of it all. It’s the difference between living and dying.
I’ll give you an example of when I’ve faced uncertainty and believe me I have faced it many times.
When he first came home with me he was just 8 weeks old. I’ve never been a ‘dog person’ as in when I was growing up we had lots of cats but never dogs, so I had absolutely no idea what to do with this ball of fluff!
My boyfriend at the time had some experience of having a Rottweiler so I thought we’d be OK. He’d be able to show me the ropes, train him with me and generally all would be fine.
As Tommy grew, he became more and more playful and grew in confidence around us both. His teeth started to grow which felt more like pins than anything else! He also became a lot more boisterous and started showing signs of dominance. This scared the hell out of me. I just did not know what to do. I started reading books about this stuff, looking on line for advice but with anything like this there are so many opinions you just don’t know which way to turn.
So I started to feel uncertain. Uncertain on whether I could take care of this little life. I became anxious and scared that I’d somehow let this little fella down by not teaching him the best and most fulfilling way to live. You see I have this overwhelming feeling of responsibility for this little life and because of this uncertainty on whether I could step up to the mark, it really played on my mind.
I started to question myself and in the end my confidence dropped to the point where when I took him out one day he got attacked by another dog, this really set me back as I just couldn’t face taking him out again.
I’d lay awake at night thinking about it, wondering where I could take him where there would be no other dogs or I’d feel sick in the mornings knowing that I’d have to take him out and worry who I’d meet along the way. I was uncertain about myself and how I could be this leader for my dog. And yeah I did feel like throwing in the towel.
But then I started to change my thoughts about why this was happening to me, why Tommy had been bitten and why I was going through all these emotions. I somehow knew that it was all there to teach to me something to push me towards a better way and a better relationship with my dog.
You see I’ve always been good at quitting and admitting that something is too difficult or too hard to continue with. In some respects its’ a good thing as if I have ever been unhappy I’ve never been afraid to admit this and move forward into something better for me. But this was different, I couldn’t just quit on Tommy. He was my responsibility and I had to do something about it. I had to overcome this fear and keep going, no matter how hard or difficult it became and I did it because I knew deep down that this was meant to happen, for me to grow.
Tommy is now 9 months old and yeah I still have the odd anxious twinge and I am continuing to work on my confidence but I am still here, Tommy is still here. That is because I carried on and I accepted that it was going to be uncertain for a while and pretty painful. There are times now where I don’t know what to do but I embrace it now and move forward because I know it’s there to teach me something new.
It’s when you accept that uncertainty, move into it and live and breathe it that’s when your life changes and takes on a whole new meaning.
Imagine if I’d stayed where I was being certain about everything, where would I be now?
I’d dread to think about it to be honest.
So what about you? What are you uncertain about? Are you going to step into it and get the courage to face it? To look deep down inside of yourself and work out why this is happening to you?
If you do I promise you, it will grow you in ways you never thought possible and your life will improve ten-fold.
Step into it today, go for it you won’t regret it….
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